German original

January 8, 2026

By Johannes Konstantin Poensgen

Classic statues, AI-generated tanks. All under the blue star-spangled banner. A slap for the most pathetic psyop of all time.

The internet is full of bots. The only question is whether their hardware is made of silicon or carbon. For some time now, Eurofeds have been the latest craze in embarrassing propaganda in Neuland.

The style

EU flags with crowns and laurels. So that at first glance, it doesn’t look like it was designed by a marketing agency in a Berlin yuppie neighborhood. Profile pictures that look a little bit like the Hitler Youth. After all, they want to attract the edgy zoomers. Classic statues, why not? Every other Indian who farms the X algorithm for Elonbucks does it, after all. Plus lots of Ukraine and weapons from European manufacturers. Unless the star-spangled tanks come from AI Production and Virtual Industries.

NAFO recycling

I don’t want to speculate here about how many of these accounts are organic, in both senses of the word. Or how many are paid for by the Commission in its attempt to wage war in the uncharted territory of the internet.

Some of them are recycled NAFO accounts. What was NAFO again? NAFO, the North Atlantic Fella Organization, called itself a pro-Ukrainian propaganda force on social media at the beginning of the war. Its trademark was a stupid little dog, which pretty much sums up the problem. There have been endless rows of more or less successful propaganda operations in this war. But NAFO quickly mutated into a troll brigade. And even though our opinion leaders have always warned us about Putin’s trolls, trolls are bad propagandists unless the target itself is ridiculous. You can’t play dragon games without ogres, and you just get on everyone’s nerves.

Simps for the EU “superpower”

But every fishing rod needs a worm, and the worms that the fish are supposed to eat are called Emmanuel Macron, Ursula von der Leyen, and Kaja Kallas. More recently, even Friedrich Merz has ascended to this heroic heaven. These people, we are told, will make Europe a superpower. Or if not with these politicians, then at least with others. Somehow. It couldn’t be more pathetic. What these people appeal to is the desire to feel big and strong. And through the EU, of all things!

Distracted projections

Even if people don’t like to talk about it, much of politics is about feeling big and strong. People fulfill their own unattainable fantasies of power by projecting them onto the great leader or the fatherland. That’s not entirely a bad thing. Without this tendency, there would be no identification with a community at all. But it goes without saying that those in power constantly exploit this urge. A single glance at the current state of MAGA is enough to see this in real time.

The temptation is so great because we all have to watch as our homeland is flooded by the Third World. Fighting against this, whether you call it remigration or something else, is arduous and actually dangerous. The police might kick down your door, and that’s an experience that doesn’t do your power fantasies any good. So you’d rather get excited about pictures of the latest armament package, which, in an emergency, would be used to incite the last young white Europeans in Donbass to protect BlackRock’s investments from Putin.

The EU is the laughing stock of the planet.

However, the “Fuck Yeah America!” faction, which applauded the bombing of Iran and the kidnapping of Nicolás Maduro simply because it was cool, at least projects a real empire. It’s not their empire. It’s the empire of Wall Street, Silicon Valley, and people like Ben Shapiro. But at least it’s an empire. The EU is nothing of the sort. It is a by-product of American hegemony over the continent. Now that the Americans are no longer quite so nice, it is simply the laughing stock of the planet. Should I watch a speech by Ursel and then feel big and powerful?

Europe is the EU – that’s the problem

And before anyone says, “Yes, but not with these Eurocrats, then with others. Europe is not the EU.” Yes, it is. Europe is the EU. Politically, at least. Europe can be whatever it wants to be culturally, historically, geographically, or ethnically. There is only one political actor called Europe, and that is the EU. Less the institutions than the political class in Brussels itself. These people, the Lagardes and von der Leyens and all their staff and officials, whom you never read about in the press. That is the political actor called Europe. There is no other. Because this political class has also grown organically – in Washington’s slipstream.

It’s all so absurd! But on Twitter, people really showed Putin and Trump again today. And tomorrow we’ll be a superpower!